by Tawnia Lives
You never knew the weight I carried.
And that was by design.
When you were little, I wanted your days filled with laughter, not worry. You were playing in the sunshine while I was hiding in the shadows, crying where you couldn’t see me. You heard giggles and joy, never the breaking that happened behind closed doors.
The truth is, I took it all off your shoulders. I held the pain so you wouldn’t have to. I carried the tears in silence so they would never fall in your presence.
That life we lived together—
it wasn’t the one I was promised.
It wasn’t the one I dreamed for you.
But even though it was heavy, I swore it would never become yours to carry.
I made you this vow: you would never grow up believing, even for one second, that you were unwanted. You would never think you were anything less than the best thing this world had ever given me.
So I covered the cracks with love. I hid the sorrow under bedtime stories and warm meals. I wrapped your life in safety, even when mine felt fragile.
Because that’s what mothers do.
We cry in silence so our children can laugh in peace.
We protect with every ounce of strength we have.
We make sure love is the loudest voice they hear.
And through it all, I never stopped whispering to myself the truth I wanted you to know:
You were loved.
You were wanted.
You were my greatest gift.
Always.
Tawnia Lives!